What we point to in all these discussions and apparent exchanges is the self evident fact of your own being. This simple, obvious and yet profound fact of your very own being; this presence of awareness that you cannot under any circumstance negate, and at the very same time you cannot grasp with any thought, word, or concept, or as any apparent object.
If it is closely looked into, THIS presence of awareness or awareness of presence is not your personal presence. It is not your presence or my presence, rather it is self-existing, self-knowing, without the need of any god there to create it. Have you ever looked into yourself in this way? Did you as the apparent entity, Mr or Mrs So and So, have any hand in creating the body-mind vehicle that you seem to inhabit, or did it arise spontaneously without your wanting it to?
How did all this happen without your permission or without your wanting it to happen or appear? Have you ever looked along these lines or considered this apparent mystery? This sense of presence, I am, that is what was born, and it wasn’t until the age of 2 or 3 years that you became aware of your existence as someone or something seemingly separate or apart from THIS ever present awareness-consciousness. The concept “I am”, and no one can grasp “I” as it is only a thought or concept; and so aided by the parents and society in general, one adds to that concept ‘I am’ all the events and experiences that occur from that early age onwards, and so takes on the false face or identity, I am So and So.
Because of this false identity with the body-mind vehicle which has arisen spontaneously, there comes with that the fear that I am going to die and disappear. Now this consciousness, “I am” that has arisen spontaneously and will depart in the same way, how has it come about, and what exactly is the cause of it? Because of what has all this come about? This is the riddle or koan that has to be solved. How did you come to be – I am So and So, and because of what are you? Unless this riddle is solved and utterly resolved, you will never know peace – the peace that passes all understanding – self-realization, the genuine, authentic, knowing of who and what you truly and ever are.
No one else can do this for you, because there is on other apart from this impersonal presence of all-knowing awareness which, up until this point; you as the imaginary entity So and So have been ignoring or taking for granted, so to speak. You could not even lift a finger or move a muscle if that animating life essence or impersonal presence of awareness was not there, yet you don’t seem to be aware of it, or to acknowledge it in any way. Isn’t this ignorance or spiritual blindness?
You are firmly in the grip of this “I” conceit or arrogance of doer ship and yet, you have never done a single thing or action of your own accord; you are not the doer of your actions, so where exactly does the question of karma come in? Karma for who exactly? Have you ever considered any of this? Isn’t it high time that you did, or is this constant psychological suffering something that you relish and enjoy? Ask yourself these questions and see for yourself, no guru or priest is going to do this inner work for you, as in your ignorance you may have somehow hoped.
Stop ignoring this naked awareness that is ever present, Omnipresent. Stop pretending to be what you are not – a limited separate human being looking out of “two” little peep holes in a stale meat-ball like head, and instead be this boundless space-like awareness that you are truly seeing out of – this space or no face that everything is appearing in. Isn’t the seeing taking place from “space” there where you are instead of out of two eyes? Isn’t the very first thing that you are seeing actually space? Can you find any center or circumference to that space of knowing where the actual seeing is taking place from?
Drop all your preconceived ideas and acquired knowledge and simply LOOK. On present evidence, without resorting to memory, words, or concepts, how many eyes are you looking out of? I suggest that you are looking out of a single edgeless eye – the Christ eye or the Buddha eye. Looking out of this single edgeless eye then your whole body if full of light – the self-evident light of awareness or naked knowing. THIS is the light that lights up every man and woman who seemingly comes into the apparent world. Know for certain, don’t think – I am the light of the world and let your light so shine before men that they will rejoice and glorify this heavenly light of naked all-knowing awareness. Wouldn’t you then rejoice and say quite confidently – I am THAT I am, that is prior to and utterly suffuses consciousness and the manifest world?